Thursday, July 22, 2010

An Open Letter to Avid Readers of Romance from Poppy's Aunt Charlotte

My dear friends,

Welcome to my splendiferous Spinster world!

You'll soon find out when you read Dukes to the Left of Me, Princes to the Right that, yes, I'm of a certain age, but no, it makes not a jot of difference when it comes to catching a man's eye. Just ask Kettle, our gorgeous butler, or the chimney sweep here on Clifford Street (he's got a wink that will melt your bones), or Lord Frederick Burns. Freddie is my secret lover and is an awful flirt, just like me, which is why we do so well together. Just last night in his carriage--

Well. Perhaps I shouldn't say here what Freddie and I did! A Spinster retains a bit of mystery about herself, always.

My point is not that I like men and am, in turn, much admired by them myself. I'm here to tell you that I am a Spinster, which means I conduct all my affairs with the opposite sex on my terms--not theirs!

And so should you.



A Spinster never compromises. Which is why she's a Spinster, of course. One should be proud to stick to one's principles. And the overriding principle of the Spinster is that she would rather be burned at the stake than marry a man she doesn't love!

All right, perhaps I'm taking that a bit far, but you know what I mean. A Spinster would rather live in a garret and earn her own bread as a seamstress or tutor or governess or even mistress than marry (shudder) where her heart is not inclined to beat with fervor and passion and all those delicious feelings that come with being in love!

In the delectable story you'll shortly be reading about my niece Poppy, you'll see several Spinsters, including moi, in action. I hope you'll gain courage from mine and Poppy's example. Nicholas may be a fine specimen of a man, but Poppy is a Spinster! He's not quite prepared for her impudence and derring-do (poor man). I'm glad to say Poppy isn't one to fall head over heels in love lightly. Nor is Nicholas. So their tale is quite interesting. I hope you enjoy it.

Do feel free to post comments about Dukes to the Left of Me, Princes to the Right here. I think Poppy and her two Spinster best friends, Eleanor and Beatrice, will be contributing something to this page as well. Until the book comes out at the end of November, I shall have to content myself by flirting with Freddie (he's asked me to marry him eighteen times) and writing up new Spinster laws, such as the one I thought of just yesterday: a Spinster never apologizes for someone else's bad behavior.

Until then, enjoy yourselves, ladies!